Benjamin Buttons

In the movie Camelot, Arthur says that Merlin "youthins."

I have begun to think that that is true of myself.
I feel like I have been old, and I am gradually returning to youth.
I get younger and younger.
It is the weirdest thing.

Kirby called it "The Amazing Story of Benjamin Buttons II."
At least my body is following the expected trajectory.  I look older.  I just feel younger.
I like it.
I haven't lost any of the confidence or knowledge I have gained via the experiences of my life, but I have lost  the emotional weight of trials that helped me acquire this knowledge.
I just feel light inside.  Like a child.

It didn't happen all at once, but gradually, over time, and it continues to happen; thus it seems to me that I am getting continually younger.

All I can think of to explain this process, is that I am learning to "cast my burdens upon the Lord."
"Take my yoke upon you, and learn of me.  For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light."

Perhaps the key is light.

“And if your eye be single to my glory, your whole bodies shall be filled with light, and there shall be no darkness in you; and that body which is filled with light comprehendeth all things.” (D&C 88:67.)

Elder Bruce R. McConkie states: “Christ is the light; the gospel is the light; the plan of salvation is the light; ‘that which is of God is light; and he that receiveth light, and continueth in God, receiveth more light; and that light groweth brighter and brighter until the perfect day.’ As the light of the sun enters the body through our natural eyes, so the light of heaven—the light of the Spirit which illuminates our souls—enters through our spiritual eyes.” (The Mortal Messiah, Salt Lake City: Deseret Book Co., 1980, 2:153; italics added.)

Chris Young The Man I Wanna Be

Kirby likes this song. . .

God I'm down here on my knees
Cause it's the last place left to fall
Beggin' for another chance
If there's any chance at all
That you might still be listenin'
Lovin' and forgivin' guys like me

I've spent my whole life gettin' it all wrong
And I sure could use your help just from now on
I wanna be a good man
A do like I should man
I wanna be the kind of man the mirror likes to see
I wanna be a strong man
And admit that I was wrong man
God I'm askin’ you to come change me
Into the man I wanna be

If there's any way for her and me to make another start
Could you see what you could do
To put some love back in her heart
Cause it gonna to take a miracle
After all I've done to really make her see

That I wanna be a stay man
I wanna be a brave man
I wanna be the kind of man she sees in her dreams
God I wanna be your man
And I wanna be her man
God I only hope she still believes
In the man I wanna be

Well I know this late at night that talk is cheap
But Lord don't give up on me yeah
I wanna be a givin' man
I wanna really start livin' man
God I'm askin’ you to come change me
Into the man I wanna be

Faith is sufficient

3 Nephi 17:8 For I perceive that ye desire that I should show unto you what I have done unto your brethren at Jerusalem, for I see that your faith is sufficient that I should heal you.

D&C 14:16 For behold, I, God, have suffered these things for all, that they might not suffer if they would repent;

Mosiah 4:2 And they had viewed themselves in their own carnal state, even less than the dust of the earth. And they all cried aloud with one voice, saying: O have mercy, and apply the atoning blood of Christ that we may receive forgiveness of our sins, and our hearts may be purified; for we believe in Jesus Christ, the Son of God, who created heaven and earth, and all things; who shall come down among the children of men.

3 And it came to pass that after they had spoken these words the Spirit of the Lord came upon them, and they were filled with joy, having received a remission of their sins, and having peace of conscience, because of the exceeding faith which they had in Jesus Christ who should come, according to the words which king Benjamin had spoken unto them.

important parts:

Beauty did it out of obedience and to help her father.
She had to do it willingly
She had to find the dream prince underneath the monster
The monster gave her everything he had to try to make her happy
He was willing to die to give her her happiness
He thought she would desert him due to his ugliness
She found that she loved him despite his appearance
She found that under the beast was the prince she had always dreamed to find.

Cans't thou bear strong meat of simple truth. . .these events are compass points..




Every young girl dreams of being a princess and finding her handsome prince.  I was no different.  I grew up the pampered and beloved daughter of gentle and loving parents.  For 12 years, I was the only daughter, with one older brother, and two younger, and then at 12  a long desired sister arrived.  I grew up safe and sheltered.  I did well in school, was involved in many clubs and activities, and got good grades.  I was a bit shy, but I had some close girlfriends, and a few brief crushes on boys along the way.  I was always dreaming of my potential perfect man and the amazing life that we would have together someday.  Well, I went off to college with my hopes and dreams, thinking that in no time I would meet my handsome prince and we would go off together to make a home much like the one I was raised in, traditional and nurturing.  I was ready to do my part to make this home a bit of heaven on earth.  I was somewhat surprised that I didn't meet this prince right away, and after 3 years of college, I was still looking for this perfect man.  At one point, I was pretty sure I had met the right fella.  I wrote to him as he went off to serve a mission for the LDS church, and then I in turn served such a mission during the same period.  After we both returned home I figured we would resume our friendship and move beyond it to fulfill my blissful dream.  This, however, was not the case.  Before we got back together at school, something rather unexpected happened.  I met my real handsome prince.  I knew it was him the moment I saw him.  I know, you think that is silly, but it is true none the less.  He was the man of my dreams, and it didn't take long to convince him that that was true.  He asked for my hand, and I accepted, and we set off on a grand adventure together, as you will see.  What I did not recognize at the time, was that inside of my handsome prince, dwelt a beast.

There's leadership, and there's manipulation.
A leader lifts people by inspiring them to work hard for good things, to overcome hardship and difficult times, and to believe in and reach their potential.  They lead by example.

Manipulation seeks popularity by promising a benevolent bestowal of good things based on puffed up images of what you should have the right to have, without embracing reality or the necessity of building successes on achievement and hard work.  They lead by coersion.

The concept of I

Ideas percolating out of my brain since reading Atlas Shrugged, by Ayn Rand

To say "I love you" one must first be able to say the "I."--Ayn Rand:

Love your neighbor as yourself.

If you do not love yourself, you cannot love your neighbor; therefore abuse is any act that compromises another's ability to love themselves.  If you compromise a person's ability to love themselves, you limit their ability to love you, or to a degree, anyone else. In relationships criticism or disloyalty weakens the foundations of love, because it undermines self esteem.  If we want our spouse, children, or others we lead or teach to achieve success, find happiness, or if we want them to love others and be kind and compassionate; we must teach them the value of their own selves.  We must teach self love.

People are drawn to things that they do well because these things validate themselves. If you want someone to be drawn to you, validate them.

Those Winter Sundays

Sundays too my father got up early
and put his clothes on in the blueblack cold,
then with cracked hands that ached
from labor in the weekday weather made
banked fires blaze. No one ever thanked him.

I'd wake and hear the cold splintering, breaking,
When the rooms were warm, he'd call,
and slowly I would rise and dress,
fearing the chronic angers of that house.

Speaking indifferently to him,
who had driven out the cold
and polished my good shoes as well.

What did I know, what did I know
of love's austere and lonely offices?

Robert Hayden

This was a poem that Bethany had in an English packet.  I just really liked it.  I was struck with the fact that people show love differently, some by words, some by actions.  Sometimes it is hard to recognize love when it is offered.